No form of gender equity can ever truly be achieved until we first work to empower femininity itself.

The idea that “femininity is artificial” is also blatantly misogynistic. Just as woman is man’s “other”, so too is femininity masculinity’s “other”. Under such circumstances, negative connotations like “artificial”, “contrived”, and “frivolous” become built into our understanding of femininity – indeed, this is precisely what allows masculinity to always come off as “natural”, “practical” and “uncomplicated”.

Consider that people will talk about the fact that I now “pass” as a woman, but nobody ever asks about how difficult it must have been for me to “pass” as a man before.

My parents were exclude from rights as farm workers, though that has to change.

When the Majority of jokes made at the expense of trans people center on “men wearing dresses” or “men who want their penises cut off” that is not transphobia- it is trans-misogyny. When the majority of violence and sexual assaults omitted against trans people is directed at trans women, that is not transphobia- it is trans-misogyny.

The most radical thing that any of us can do is to stop projecting our beliefs about gender onto other people’s behaviors and bodies.

When you’re a trans woman, you are made to walk this very fine line, where if you act feminine you are accused of being a parody, but if you act masculine, it is seen as a sign of your true male identity. And if you act sweet and demure, you’re accused of reinforcing patriarchal ideals of female passivity, but if you stand up for your own rights and make your voice heard, then you are dismissed as wielding male privilege and entitlement.

The hardest part has been learning how to take myself seriously when the entire world is constantly telling me that femininity is always inferior to masculinity.

Male pride is not really about pride. It’s about fear – the fear of being seen as feminine. And that’s why “girl stuff” is so dangerous. And as long as most men remain deathly afraid of it, they’ll continue to take it out on the rest of us.

Sometimes we do that to ourselves – we pit our desires against one another. We insist unnecessarily on seeing one aspect of our personality as being at odds with the rest of ourselves.